Read the Personals
VEGAS-BOUND – Old retired guy looking for same with car. You drive both ways; I pay for deluxe hotel. Prime location/4 days. We share cost of meals. Quality sportswear attire. #Win-Win.
AIR GUITAR – Some missing strings but still plays sweetly. $25 bargain. Similar available for left-handed player. Your choice, or both for $40. A real bargain. #Ziggy
GOLDEN GIRL – My name is Lexie. I am friendly, loving, obedient, faithful. Long walks, riding in your car, playing catch. I will wait for you at the front door every night and eat out of your hand. I am a 2-year-old golden retriever, free to a very good home. #WoofSweet
DONKEY – For Sale. $400 obo. Ceephus is his name. He is a hard worker and will pull his weight-plus. Now tell me the truth, if you live on rugged terrain, how would it be to ride your own lovable donkey around your property? He’s fairly quiet (most of the time). #Don-key-o-tay.
COMPANION – Senior female looking for person of either sex who enjoys playing card games and can drive at night. Expert Bridge player, a plus. I will provide cocktails, snacks. #CardShark
Irene DeBlasio, retired essayist and poet, moved to Laguna Woods from Studio City.
@Cardshark and @winwin made me laugh, young lady, but I do believe I have read a few of these before. Are you recycling? How very green of you!
Great stuff, as always, Miss De Blasio.
How very observant of you to notice we had some reruns this week. We promise to make an extra effort not to repeat next time.
It sounds like you enjoy gambling (#Cardshark and #WinWin). In any case, I hope you’ll continue to enjoy reading this column.
As I mentioned before, I am probably the third oldest person residing in the Golden State — you’re correct, I’m turning green.
No no young lady, no gambling for me. Those happened to be the two new ones.
I doubt very much you are old and anyway, I was never good at math so pay no mind to numbers.
I hope to see you next week and, while it’s good to be green, will anticipate an all-new column.
Cheers!
Lettuce spray.