Christmas Tree Caper
I didn’t get the message. I showed up the Sunday after Thanksgiving with grandkids in tow for the tree lighting ceremony at the Montage. “Pop-Pop, where’s the tree?” which is a great question coming from the grandkid who up until then could only ask why this and why that. “I’m not sure. Maybe they moved it,” I answered. “Okay, let’s check out the Ritz,” the leader of our pack commanded. I didn’t want to appear insubordinate, so I replied, “Yes, everything tastes great when it sits on a Ritz.” That got a rise out of them. “Yuck, Pop-Pop. We don’t want to eat the tree. We just want to look at it. Say cheese everybody,” instructed my TMZ child, as she captured a group selfie of us gaping at the tree that wasn’t there.
What was I thinking? We couldn’t go to the Ritz. Two of my young and the restless had managed last year to eat their way through the gingerbread houses. The dog wasn’t welcomed, either. At Yappy Christmas a year ago, the mutt showed Santa that his bite was worse than his bark. So until further notice, the Crantz clan was put on the Ritz naughty list. So I just had to make our trek to the Montage work out. The grandkids love the Montage tree lighting ceremony. That’s all they talk about months before it happens. Maybe I could lay the blame on Laguna’s view proponents. I’ll tell the kids that residents behind the Montage complained that the tree blocked their ocean views. Nah, the ocean is way too big to be blocked by just one tree. That flimsy explanation wouldn’t carry water. I needed more. Oh, I’ll add that the lights were too bright and conflicted with Laguna’s nighttime lighting ordinance. Yes, that extra reason will help. Now I was getting somewhere. And to make sure the kids really buy in, I’ll throw on top that all the children last year made so much noise that the Montage was declared a Quiet Zone.
No, scratch that. I can’t blame kids for just being kids. I should keep the blame where it always belongs on the adults. Okay then. The Christmas tree area was now under consideration as a village entrance, a roundabout, an additional bike lane and a needed parking lot. Yes, these reasons should satisfy my motley crew.
“Pop-Pop, have you been nipping at the spiked eggnog, again? Those are the stupidest reasons we’ve ever heard of,” cried the children. “Don’t make up stuff. Always tell the truth. You won’t get any presents.” Oops. My bad. Now I had truly dug a hole for the tree and me. Geez, I’m the Grinch who stole Christmas. Now, I was feeling truly sorry for myself when what to my amazing ears did I hear, “Go ask the concierge,” suggested the why this and why that child. I beamed back. “That’s a great idea. You’re so smart. Concierges know everything.”
The Montage concierge told us not to worry. The big Christmas event has just been changed and promises to be bigger and better. On Dec. 13, Montage will sponsor The Winter Concert Classic at the Irvine Bowl. The event will have a winter wonderland with holiday activities, sounds of the season, falling snow and a visit from Old Saint Nick himself. The why this and why that child nodded at the concierge’s explanation and said, “Sounds good, but can Loggins still play “House at Pooh Corner,” without Messina?”
The Crantz clan has decided to find out the answer to that question and promises to report back soon.
