Christmas Eve in Laguna
‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the town
City Council was voting, letting residents down.
The staff was concocting new ways to spend
The resident’s money with hardly an end.
The Audit committee was busy agreeing
That city was handling money too freely.
And Planning Commission was selling downtown
Telling City Council, the new plan was sound.
When out on the streets there arose such a clatter
“Wait,” residents said, “we really do matter!”
Away to the meetings they flew like a flash
Trying to speak, alas only to crash.
The moon on the artwork in front of the city
Gave a cry, “Is it art or is it gritty?”
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
But a mushroom enticing the tourists here!
With brand new police cars so bold and expressive
I knew in a moment they were indeed impressive!
More rapid than bad guys, the cars did the job
Chasing the criminals—Laguna won’t be robbed.
Now Pietig! Now Kohn!
Now Iseman! Now Blake!
On Dicterow, On Whalen!
On Kempf ! No mistake!
To the end of the meeting!
To the end of the night!
Change it so we can go home
As developers came bearing their gifts
When they met with an obstacle causing a rift
They threw money and magic to obscure their desires
And assumed residents’ objections would retire.
And then in a twinkling the residents fought back
“Wait, this is our town, you can’t do that!
We want new things but keep them compatible
Changing the town is just problematical.”
Laguna was dressed all in lights and good cheer
Forest Avenue was closed—Hospitality night is here!
Why not do this all the rest of the time
Let people stroll to shop, meet and dine?
The ocean—how it twinkled! The beach how inviting!
The grass was a carpet, the boardwalk enticing!
But Staff wanted to change that which we know
And make it a place where no one can go.
With 10 million to spend let’s get rid of our trees
But let sewage flow to the ocean with ease.
The Digester—historic with a little round roof
That shook when Council said “Away” with a poof.
It was chubby and plump, filled with lots of old stuff
A good bath and it could be a real cream puff.
A wink of an eye and the tennis courts next
Could they be a food court or an art complex?
He spoke many words, wanting lots of hotels
Is there parking for those who in Laguna dwell?
Do we need more tourists for which residents pay
Police, lifeguards and bathrooms so they can all play?
Despite all these issues, all these big road blocks
Laguna is paradise and continues to rock.
May I wish you the best and I say clear and bright
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!”
Michèle Monda has lived in Laguna Beach for 15 years with her husband, Emil, and three sons. She is secretary of Laguna Beach Republicans and treasurer of Laguna Beach Sister Cities.