Read the Warning Label
By Irene DeBlasio
Item: WARNING LABEL ATTACHED:
Baby stroller: Remove child before folding.
Clothes iron: Do not iron clothes on body.
Nytol (clinically proven night-time sleep aid): May cause drowsiness.
Egg carton: This product may contain eggs.
Deer crossing: (We hope they can read.)
Self-defense pepper spray: May irritate eyes.
Vidal Sassoon hair dryer: Do not use while sleeping.
Chainsaw: Do not hold the wrong end of a chainsaw.
Sunshield to protect car dashboard from sun: Do not drive with sun shade in place.
Superman costume: This costume does not enable flight or super strength.
Retired essayist and poet Irene DeBlasio has
relocated to Laguna Woods from Studio City.