Good Times Coming
The Pageant of the Masters has selected its 2019 theme. Stand still for it. Hold that pose. Ta da. Let’s hear it for “The Time Machine.” No. No. Stop clapping. Stay in character. That’s better. No reaction. Ah, picture perfect.
The Pageant of Masters director, Diane Challis Davy, made the announcement by showing off the new time machine. Challis Davy climbed into the contraption. It was a dead ringer for a Toyota Prius. She set the controls for 24 years ago. Poof. There sat Challis Davy as director of the Pageant of the Masters. Challis Davy reset the controls for 24 years into the future. Poof. There still sat Challis Davy as the director of the stillest show on earth.
It was a relief to see that the Pageant will remain in capable hands. Challis Davy says the time machine is safe for participants and audience goers. A Pageant consultant explained: “It is not self-driving. We didn’t want to take a chance that the vehicle would be hacked and taken over during a performance. Imagine if in Act 1, Scene 1, the vehicle is hijacked to the AT&T Dallas Cowboys Football Stadium. We couldn’t take the chance that owner Jerry Jones would give it back for the rest of the performance.
Jerry Jones couldn’t be reached for comment because we didn’t know what year to look for him in. That was relief in and of itself. Jones obviously has his own time machine and is frantic to find the year the Cowboys win the next Super Bowl. As far as we can determine, he’s travelling in the 60th century and still looking.
For us Lagunans stuck in the here and now, it will be exciting to witness time travel. It’s rumored that the opening act takes the audience back to caveman times. A cave child is being reprimanded for drawing on the cave walls. The drawing is of the game “Hangman,” and the word spelled out is Abel. Cain is being shown the importance of drawing on paper and not on walls.
In announcing the show’s theme, Challis Davy said she would like to travel back to Stratford-upon-Avon and find out who Shakespeare’s “ghost writer” really was. Fortunately, I can save her the trip. The ghost writer was the great, great, great, great, great, great, great…(add 340 more greats here)…grandfather of Pageant script writer, Dan Duling.
Well, now we know why next year’s Pageant of the Masters will be, “All’s Well That Ends Well.”
Crantz tells the Indy that he would ask Shakespeare why the Globe Theatre was round and not mid century modern.