Poetry Runoff
Whew. I read in the Indy that the first case of an offending tree obstructing the skyline has been settled. Only a few details remain. There appears to be one tree house found in the tree, whose origin remains unknown, but may be eligible for the Heritage list. And a person found in the undetermined Heritage tree house could be eligible for “Water Saver of the Year” award. The city council has convened a special committee to investigate the situation and report back to see if the tree might block progress on the village entrance project. Eli Grossman objected immediately to the village entrance project, the tree, the tree house, the Heritage list, the special committee, the city council, the police department, but will gladly accept the “Water Saver of the Year” award.
And that spirit de corps got me thinking. Eli’s courage to enter the fray and speak his mind is fueled by a sense of civic duty to make Laguna a better place. So, I nominate Eli for a new position I just made up, City Council Poet Laureate. Eli does not know about this nomination. I don’t even know if Eli likes poetry or can rhyme his civic objections. But more importantly, we need a poet laureate. See I don’t think we are out of the woods yet on the trees versus views debate. There may be a better way to settle the score, so we can move on to sea star wasting disease and verify if I have it or not. “Oops, there goes another rubber tree limb. I’ve got high, high hopes, high apple pie in the sky hopes to finish this column before plop. Oops, please forgive all further typos.”
Lucky for readers, I seem to have a nose for typing, as well as, poet laureates. One rumor says that Jon Madison, who unsuccessfully ran for city council, has reassured folks that Eli has a PhD in poetry. Supposedly Eli’s doctoral thesis begins, “There once was a Grossman from Nantucket/ Who kept his complaints in a bucket/The list was long and he threw them out for a song/But as for the bucket, watch out Lagunuckets.
That was good enough for me. Eli’s my man. The view ordinance took years in the making, but in the event of future deadlocks, I’m suggesting “Poetry Runoff.” Tree supporting neighbors pick poems about trees. View supporting neighbors pick poems about ocean views. Here’s a runoff example.
“Trees” by Joyce Kilmer
I think I shall never see
A poem as lovely as a tree
A tree that may in Summer wear
A nest of robins in her hair;
Poems are made by fools like me,
But only God can make a tree
Versus
“Looking West from Laguna Beach at Night” by Charles Wright
I’ve always liked the view from my mother-in-law’s house at night,
Oil rigs off Long Beach
Like floating lanterns out in the smog dark Pacific
Stars in the eucalyptus,
Curry the physics of metamorphosis and its endgame
But I’ve spent my life knowing nothing.
As an example, Eli would weigh the selections. Kilmer admits she’s a fool. Wright admits he knows nothing. Seems like a deadlock, but wait… stars in the eucalyptus may refer to Ann Christoph’s planted high school eucalyptus trees and is a surprise reference for an ocean view poem. Is it enough to sway the poet laureate?
It does. Eli agrees. Trees win by a mention. Ocean view loses. Wright’s mother-in-law was not reached for comment.
“Oops. There goes another rubber nose limb…Thw Emd.”
Mark splits his time between California and Michigan, but is always in the state of confusion and befuddlement. His wife told us so.
