Reading Opens Dialogue on Family Diversity

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Parents and children listen to readings by Jessica Herthel, left, and Chris Tebbutt that promote respect for diversity at El Morro Elementary this week. Photo by Marilynn Young.
Parents and children listen to readings by Jessica Herthel, left, and Chris Tebbutt that promote respect for diversity at El Morro Elementary this week.
Photos by Marilynn Young.

 

When Chris Tebbutt and his husband Bob Fouhy relocated from Boston to Laguna Beach a year ago, Tebbutt says the language he encountered on forms when registering their boys for school surprised him. The forms asked for the names of mothers and fathers.

PTA meetings that Tebbutt and Fouhy attended also overlooked untraditional parents, with dialogue about room-moms and name tags colored pink for girls and blue for boys. He says he had to push for a Father’s Day celebration to match the traditional Mother’s Day activities in the classroom.

Instead of taking offense, Tebbutt took action. And his efforts already are gaining traction.

To heighten awareness and tolerance for different kinds of parents within the district, he took his concerns to Superintendent Jason Viloria. Tebbutt said he introduced him to the Welcome Schools Program, an initiative of the Human Rights Campaign.

The program provides training guidelines about inclusive practices to promote a respect for diversity and the LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender) student population.

 

Tebbutt also volunteered to read author Todd Parr’s “The Family Book,” which focuses on love that flourishes in families of every type. Nearly 55 adults and 30 children attended the reading this week at El Morro Elementary, sanctioned by Principal Christopher Duddy. Tebbutt shared the spotlight with Newport Beach mother Jessica Herthel. She co-wrote “I am Jazz” with television star Jazz Jennings. The book describes Jenning’s experience as a child “with a boy’s body and a girl’s brain” and coming out as transgender.

 

The two parents, seated in rocking chairs with a warm reading lamp between them, read and showed visuals on a projected screen in the multi- purpose room Tuesday, Dec. 6.

Lisa Barreth, 52, center, and her two children took part in a special reading about family diversity at El Morro this past Tuesday, Dec. 6.
Lisa Barreth, 52, center, and her two children took part in a special reading about family diversity at El Morro this past Tuesday, Dec. 6.

“Parents need to be educated,” agreed Lisa Barreth, who attended the reading with her two sons, Logan, 8, and Oliver, 6. She’s now a fulltime mother, raising her sons on her own after a split with her former partner and the sale of her business.

Talking to children about respecting and including others supports teachers trying to instill similar values, said Barreth, also a PTA vice-president. “I would like to see more parents at another reading,” she said.

El Morro counselor Marianne Lawson said some parents attended “not because they had a diverse family, but because they are in full support of diversity and did not know how to start the conversation with their children,” about families with same-sex parents.

The district already complies with state law AB 1732, the bathroom access law that allows students to use facilities consistent with their gender identity, said district spokesperson Leisa Winston.

And at two workshops this school year, Duddy says he has shared material with El Morro staff from the Welcome Schools program that highlights how to redirect gender exclusion or put-downs with gender-neutral responses.

Instead of the statement, “boys are better at sports,” the material suggests a stereotype-defying response such as, “No group is best. Some are good. Some are not.”

Tebbett said his advocacy for reading “The Family Book,” at El Morro has encountered some resistance, including one parent who told him “we feel our kids are too young to know about those things.”

Tebbett sees it differently. “This is about living an authentic life. When we talk about gay, we’re not talking about sexuality, we’re talking about love.”

 

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