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Read The Personals

By Irene DeBasio
By Irene DeBasio

GEEZERS ANONYMOUS – If you’re an old guy who likes to hang out and play cards, join us. Bring along a pack of cards and a couple of cigars; folding chair is vital.  #GrumpyGuys

FOR WOMEN ONLY – Gender specific/over 50.  Do you like to give and receive manicures, facials and do yoga stretches?  Green tea.  Come and join our merry group. #GirlsGoneWild

SLOW COOKER POT – Only used once (it’s way too slow for me – almost gave me a nervous breakdown).  $50 or best offer.  I can use the cash!  #MicrowavePizzaLover

LAWN MOWER – Like new. People didn’t think I’d enjoy mowing my lawn and I don’t. It’s a beautiful piece of equipment but I’m moving to a retirement home; can’t use it.  #GetOffMyLawn

ABANDONED – Very pretty, smallish beach umbrella found on Wesley Street beach. Floral print in pastel colors with initials.  Call and identify monogram.  #RandomActs

 

Irene DeBlasio, retired essayist and poet, has moved to Laguna Woods from Studio City.

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4 COMMENTS

  1. I gotta tell you Miss De Blasio, this made me smile. After a long and terrible afternoon I appreciate that!

    So you know I stood in my neighborhood Gelsons for about ten minutes yesterday, Indy in hand, looking for your column! Is it not in the print version or am I now blind (along with all my other maladies)? I would have kept looking but the dogs were restless.

    Favorite was the crooker pot. Laughed out loud. Keep it up!

  2. Dear GeeDee,

    I appreciate having you as a fan. The slow cooker pot might have been my personal ad — what a frustrating method of cooking. I’m delighted to hear that you picked up the Laguna Beach Indy at Gelson’s. It happens to be one of my favorite markets too.
    Many thanks for your comment.
    Irene DeBlasio

  3. Well, Gary I guess the slow cooker pot is not for you or me. I agree with you.
    I’m not a fan of fast food either.
    Come back next week and we’ll try to find something more suitable.

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