Read the Personals
TWIN SISTERS – 37 years old. We sing and dance, we bake deliciousness from the homeland. We are work live-in maids, for big or small house. We clean, cook and make happy entertainments in exchange for safe place to live. #Tina&Nina
KATRINA FLOATING Saturn – beautiful vintage car rescued from Hurricane Katrina. She spent a couple of weeks in floods but she’s all dried out now, in pretty good shape. She needs a little work, maybe a coat of paint. Best offer. #SaturnRising
DELUXE ALASKA CRUISE. I am Lucybelle, 64 years old – looking for older lady who can impersonate my momma. She won a cabin with a veranda on cruise to Alaska. Sadly, she died months ago. Tall, thin, white hair with glasses. #AuditionMonday
79 YEAR OLD retired man with beautiful home on the beach looking for a kind woman: young, medium or old. If you are a humble, grateful, happy woman who likes to walk on the beach and appreciates music, let’s get together. #TiredOldGuy
START YOUR OWN CHARITY. That’s right – for a nominal fee I will set up your non-profit corporation. You can have a medical, educational or art tax-exempt status in a short period of time. I do all your filings fast. #FoundationsRUs
Irene DeBlasio, retired essayist and poet, lives in Laguna Woods.
Hahahaha I loved #AuditionMonday! I will pass on the cruise (unless it goes somewhere I’d prefer like the Med or Caribbean) but it made me laugh. A great way to start the day so thanks.
Geedee, Who knows? Maybe there will be another cruise offer which will interest you. How about taking advantage of the offer by the twins? They cook, clean and entertain — I’m sure they also bake. Sounds like a good deal to me.