Just for Laughs

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Read the Personals

By Irene DeBasio

CHEVY SILVERADO (2004) in excellent running condition – new battery, new tires. Post-Hurricane Katrina body paint is discolored and needs to be repainted. Interior needs repairs. Make an offer. #ChevyFromLevee

LAKEFRONT ESTATE – Build your dream house. Get in on the ground level – new community being planned. No roads, no utilities,no lake yet. We are ready to build it for you – millionaire’s row. Drive to parking lot, we get you there by Jeep. #HaveALookSee

CAMEL-COLORED MEN’S Bomber Jacket – Large. Reduced to $45 due to mustard stains on sleeves. Nice! #HotDogEatingContest

COMMUNICATIONS Specialist needed ASAP. Candidate must have Bachelor’s Degree in Communications, must be alert and willingto work overtime, must have excellent references, must be energetic and reliable, must be fluent in Japanese. #OmakaseMe

GLOOMY GUS – Older retired, single guy looking for companion – must be older male who enjoys going to the race track, trips toVegas for gambling, playing cards, smoking cigars, steak dinners, watch boxing, deep-sea fishing. #BigGuysOnly

 

Irene DeBlasio, retired essayist, lives in Laguna Woods.

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3 COMMENTS

  1. I was almost sold on the bomber jacket until I saw it has mustard stains! I don’t think it would match my pants with ketchup stains so I’ll have to pass.

    Great column!

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