Opinion: Wisdom Workout


Put the New in your New Year

Susan Valesquez

Knowing where you are is the first step in making new decisions. Self-honesty might not be sexy, but it is crucial to your sanity.

Most of us make our decisions based on what we like or don’t like. If we like something, we go after it, and we try to avoid what we don’t like.

The “I like it/I don’t like it” approach will keep you stuck in living a small, predictable life that can easily become stagnant and rigid. Why? The only way you know beforehand what you like or don’t like is if you have already had a similar experience. Therefore, making decisions based solely on personal likes or dislikes stops life’s flow.

Nothing new can find you. You will stop the wonder and delight that comes through unanticipated experiences of synchronicity. The true gifts of the universe come wrapped in light and love. Openness and acceptance of new experiences requires trust in the basic goodness of yourself and the basic goodness of your life.

So, the first part of the formula to broaden your self-assessment is to decide if you are ready to transform what isn’t working. 

If your answer is yes, here is the next question. Are you willing to create a life that works? Wanting what isn’t working to go away is one part, and being willing to create what does work requires another yes. 

Everyone wants a life that works. Many people wish, dream, long for, grasp at, demand, command, lust after, and suffer over their current situations. 

What works is to commit your will, your willingness, and your willpower to the business of living your life to the fullest. Will you soften your heart, open your mind, uplift your spirit, un-numb, defrost, and live life as though you’ve never been hurt? It isn’t necessary to know how to do that at this point.

If your answer is yes, continue. If your answer is no, ask a few more questions. Who are you blaming or resenting because they hurt you deeply? Are you lost? Are you drowning, going down for the third time, and still unwilling or unable to call out for help?

Are you so deeply disappointed that you won’t let your heart and soul participate fully again? Did you squelch your hurt feelings, cut off your tears, and cut short your grieving, and now your sad is stuck and really mad? Are you waiting for someone else to read your mind, figure you out, fix it, and make it all better? Are you lusting after perfection and won’t accept anything less? Are you acting spoiled and emotionally immature? Are you holding an unrealistic picture of what a successful life is? 

If you are willing to answer any of these questions sincerely, you might be able to get unstuck and start moving again. Remember, no one ever feels 100% able when confronting hard situations. Lighten up on yourself. Ask for guidance, internal and external, take the first steps, and let go of having to have all the answers right now.

Be willing to ask for inner inspiration about the right action for you right now and take the risk of accepting external help by asking for what you need, even though it is uncomfortable. 

Your intuitive guidance can soothe and smooth the journey if you will allow yourself to let go, let down, and do whatever is necessary to become ready, willing, and able to receive new ways of learning to thrive.

Susan has created and produced personal development seminars for over four decades and is the author of Beyond Intellect: Journey into the Wisdom of Your Intuitive Mind. Learn more at: www.susanvelasquez.com.

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