Opinion: Wisdom Workout 

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Love Wants to Dance 

Love is a context, not a behavior. Marilyn Ferguson – The Aquarian Conspiracy (1980) 

Susan Velasquez

The fall season officially arrived last weekend. It begins with the autumnal equinox. It is also the Libra season; the sun sign is often known to represent balance, equanimity and harmony. Those qualities speak of the softer, emotionally tender and more subtle aspects of our lives. The internal landscape of our unfulfilled longings may whisper to us at this time if we are willing to slow down enough to hear. Though February is the official holiday reserved for celebrating love, this time of year may be the perfect opportunity to deepen, soften, open to and welcome love to take up residence as a full, contributing partner.  

Our drive to belong often needs to be satisfied before we can genuinely give and receive love. Longing for love is a secret pastime for many.  

Longing by itself has an inertia problem. It can’t fund the energy to risk personal involvement nor the ability to commit to new ways of relating. It is too weak to produce lasting outcomes and is only slightly more powerful than its sisters, wishing and hoping. 

Belonging is also related to longing. If we hyphenate belonging, it becomes be-longing. Be your longing. If you are willing to acknowledge that you have unfulfilled desires to love and be loved, you can actually activate a process of self-healing. The first step is to accept that your heart has been on a starvation diet. You have a hungry heart. 

Feel into those empty spaces in your heart that you have unwittingly closed and locked in to protect yourself from being hurt. Look for those places where past heart hurts got trapped, sequestered off into secret pockets of heavy-heartedness. Notice how much energy these old memories take from your present ability to give and receive love. 

Why would I ask you to put your attention on past painful experiences? Strange as it may seem, stopping, reflecting and surrendering into a deeper acceptance of the fact that you have been hurt gives you access to the wisdom that love requires vulnerability. It isn’t for the weak-hearted. 

Be your longing. Belonging to yourself activates your ability to soothe and smooth the rough edges around your heart. It activates the power that resides in you to unlock and open the doors to your heart. This authority to re-energize your heart’s strength rests solely with you. Focusing your attention on your heart can also activate lightheartedness. 

Take a few easy and gentle breaths as your heart begins to respond. Next, take a few deeper breaths. Imagine that your heart is awakening from a deep sleep. It expands, stretches and breathes a sigh of relief. Now that it finally has your attention, it will soon be ready and willing to participate with you as you ignite your desire to live fully and love well. Take your time as the grace of love takes up permanent residence in your life.   

Susan has loved being a part of this beautiful city since 1986. She is the author of Beyond Intellect: Journey into the Wisdom of Your Intuitive Mind. For more information, check out susanvelasquez.com.

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